The First Time He Chose Her
The rain finally arrived an hour later.
Heavy, cold rain poured across Blackwood University while students rushed between buildings holding jackets over their heads and laughing through the storm. Campus lights reflected softly against wet sidewalks, turning the entire university silver beneath the dark evening sky.
Still standing outside the psychology building, Lucas Reed and Ava Monroe remained beneath the covered entrance while thunder rolled somewhere far above them.
Neither moved immediately after Lucas admitted the truth.
I still would’ve chosen you.
The words stayed suspended heavily between them, changing everything quietly.
Ava looked at him like she still couldn’t fully believe someone had finally chosen her first, honestly and without hesitation hidden underneath it. The vulnerability in her expression nearly destroyed Lucas emotionally, because suddenly he realized how deeply rejection had shaped the way she loved people.
She expected abandonment before affection fully arrived.
God.
That thought alone hurt him.
Ava wrapped her arms loosely around herself while rain blurred the campus behind Lucas into soft gray lights. Her breathing still looked slightly uneven, like his confession physically affected her more than she knew how to hide.
Finally, she laughed softly under her breath, shaking her head once in disbelief.
“You really have no idea what that sentence just did to me.”
Lucas’s chest tightened immediately.
“What do you mean?”
Ava looked down briefly before answering quietly, “I spent so much time convincing myself I was the girl people settled for eventually, not the girl they actually chose first.”
The honesty in her voice shattered something inside him.
Because suddenly Lucas understood that this entire time, Ava wasn’t just afraid of losing him to Hailey. She was afraid of becoming temporary again, becoming another almost-love somebody walked away from once someone brighter appeared.
Lucas stepped closer instinctively while rain hammered softly around the entrance.
“You’re not temporary to me.”
Ava looked up at him immediately after hearing that, and God, the emotion in her eyes nearly made his heartbeat stop completely.
Neither of them spoke for several seconds afterward. They simply stood there beneath the storm looking at each other while tension and tenderness tangled painfully between them.
Then quietly, almost like she was afraid to ask, Ava whispered, “Does she know?”
Lucas exhaled slowly.
“That I chose you?” He rubbed tiredly at the back of his neck. “Not directly.”
Ava nodded once, but sadness flickered softly across her face again anyway.
“She already knows,” she murmured.
And honestly, Lucas thought she was probably right.
Hailey had always noticed the truth before either of them fully admitted it aloud.
The realization filled him with guilt all over again.
Ava noticed immediately, of course she did. Her expression softened gently while she looked at him standing there emotionally torn apart by two different forms of heartbreak.
“You don’t have to look guilty every time you look at me,” she whispered softly.
Lucas laughed weakly under his breath.
“I literally don’t know how not to.”
Ava’s eyes lowered slightly after hearing that.
Then quietly, “I hate that part of this.”
“What part?”
“The fact you’re hurting while choosing me.”
God.
The sadness in her voice physically hurt his chest.
Lucas stepped even closer until only inches separated them now. Rain drifted in softly around the edges of the entrance while cold wind moved through Ava’s dark hair.
“You’re not the reason I’m hurting,” he said quietly, honestly. “Losing someone good is.”
Ava looked at him carefully after hearing that, and suddenly Lucas realized something important.
She wasn’t jealous of Hailey.
She grieved for her too.
That somehow made everything infinitely more heartbreaking.
Ava leaned lightly against the railing behind her while thunder echoed softly through the sky again.
“She loved you loudly,” she whispered, her gray eyes drifting toward the rain outside. “I think that’s why part of me always felt guilty for wanting you too.”
Lucas frowned slightly.
“You never stole me from her.”
Ava laughed softly, but sadness lived underneath it.
“It doesn’t really feel that simple.”
Fair.
Nothing about this situation had ever been simple.
Rain continued pouring across campus while students sprinted through puddles below them, their laughter echoing faintly through the storm. Meanwhile Lucas stood there realizing his heart had already made its decision even though guilt still refused to let him feel fully happy about it.
The realization scared him slightly.
Because choosing Ava didn’t erase the pain he caused Hailey.
And maybe it never would.
Ava looked toward him again eventually, her expression softer now.
“You know what’s weird?” she murmured.
“What?”
“I spent weeks trying to stop myself from falling for you.” A faint smile touched her lips. “And now you’re standing here looking at me like I’m the only person you can breathe around.”
God.
Lucas physically felt that sentence.
Because somehow, unbelievably, she understood exactly what loving her felt like already.
Peaceful.
Safe.
Like loneliness finally stopped echoing so loudly inside him.
Without fully thinking about it, Lucas reached for her hand again. Their fingers intertwined naturally now, warm against the cold evening air.
Ava looked down briefly at their hands before softly admitting, “I’m still scared.”
Lucas brushed his thumb gently across her knuckles.
“Of me?”
“No,” she whispered, looking back up at him slowly. “Of how much you matter to me already.”
The vulnerability in her voice nearly destroyed him.
Because honestly, he felt it too.
Too much.
Too quickly.
And maybe that was the terrifying thing about certain people, they entered your life quietly and suddenly became emotionally essential before you fully realized what was happening.
Rain softened slightly outside while silence settled warmly between them.
Not awkward silence.
The kind that only existed between people who understood each other deeply.
Then suddenly Ava smiled faintly and whispered, “You know this is the first time somebody chose me over someone like Hailey, right?”
Lucas’s chest tightened painfully again.
Someone like Hailey.
Bright, beautiful, easy to love loudly.
Meanwhile Ava still spoke about herself like she existed slightly behind other girls.
God.
Lucas stepped closer without thinking before lifting his free hand gently against her cheek.
Ava visibly stopped breathing for a second.
“You need to stop talking about yourself like you’re second place to anyone,” he whispered softly.
The emotion that crossed her face afterward nearly ruined him completely.
Because nobody had ever defended her heart that carefully before.
Ava leaned slightly into his touch, her eyes closing briefly.
And suddenly, for the first time since this entire painful situation began, Lucas felt something stronger than guilt rise quietly inside his chest.
Certainty.
Not perfect certainty.
Not painless certainty.
But real.
He wanted her.
Not because Hailey failed to love him enough.
Not because Ava understood him more quietly.
Simply because somewhere along the way, his heart began reaching for her before he consciously noticed it happening.
And honestly?
That truth wasn’t changing anymore.